Virgin on the Ridiculous September 11, 2007
Posted by Jen in : Journal , trackbackDuring my taxi services yesterday, my adorable children began a conversation about what they thought their lives would be like by the time they’re 40.
No 1 Son (13) (in his Brian Blessed voice): Oh, well, I’ll be working really hard and eating out at nice restaurants a lot.
Me: D’you think you’ll be married and have children by then?
No 1 Son: Oh, yes, definitely. Let’s face it - we’re a great joy to you, aren’t we?
I don’t say very much to that bit.
No 2 Son (11): You’re not gonna have kids. You’ll still be a virgin when you’re 40. In fact, you’ll probably be a virgin forever.
No 1: Well, at least I’m likely to find real love – not like you when you’re a “professional footballer” (actually does fingers in the air thing) with your tarty gold diggers.
Whatever happened to naivety? It’s another world these days, isn’t it?
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It certainly is another world these days …. and it’s scary..
I’m intruiged with son No. 1’s Brian Blessed voice! Hope he doesn’t have the beard to match:))
Children speaking of virgins and golddiggers and the such? Whatever next!!!
That is priceless! Number 1 and Number 2 so certain of their respective futures.
Your sons sound like a riot! lol!
Lane - no beard but a booming voice to rival Brian Blessed’s - it actually does make the cutlery rattle in the drawers!
Kate - awful really, isn’t it? They were all excited about going blackberry picking today because they saw 3 stags in the field. At least they’re still children sometimes
Karen - beasts, the pair of ‘em! I do wonder what they really will be like once they get past the surly, grunting phase…
A. Writer - hmmm, never a dull moment, that’s for sure!
Your boys sound like endless amusement. Kids are like sponges - they pick up the strangest things too!
Well Jen, hon, at least no. 1 knows he’ll have to work hard to eat in those nice restaurants and he’s wise to the ways of loose women. You’ve evidently instilled some sense into their young minds! Well done you.
But I love the “we’re a great joy to you though!” That’s the best bit ever.
Yep, I agree with LQS “Let’s face it - we’re a great joy to you, aren’t we?” Absolutely classic. I came back to read it again, and it even made me laugh second time around.
JJx
Angie - they really are sponges. I can’t believe how worldly-wise they are sometimes; far more so than me really!
LQS + JJ - (ooh, that looks like algebra) Yes, well, they do come out with some tosh. Weird thing is, I think he meant it?!?!?!
which one will be happier I wonder? No 1 (virgin?) son who has found true love…or no 2 son with all his ‘tarty gold diggers’??
hil. ar.ious.
Spooky…just when I was thinking of becoming a Footballer’s Wife. I like the sound of being a tarty gold digger even better.
Your boys sound great company - think they’d get on with my thirteen yr old who is planning to get a company car.
Any luck with your articles yet?
Fiona - scratching head.
Rebecca - if they don’t start washing sometime soon, they’ll both be virgins forever!
Fiona - a company car, eh? That’s good forward thinking! I don’t think I could be doing with becoming a footballer’s wife OR a gold digger. Am happy being a bit skint but not having to bother with the whole high heels thing. Articles, hmmm… am researchiing at the mo. If I’m gonna do it, I’m gonna do it properly! (Ooh, you’ve got me scratching now.)
Boys are fabulous! My middle (nearly eight) just told me that he has decided to be gay! Where do I start????
Cx
Your boys sound great! And they’ve inherited your way with words -Tarty Gold-Digger - sounds like the name of Best in Show at Crufts (Golden Retriever, of course.)
Mya x
Oh, Caroline, that is sooo funny. Boys are the best, aren’t they?
Mya - Crufts winner or porn star, perhaps? And yes, they are great. A bit. Sometimes.
Your boys are sooo precocious. I have one son, my only child, and raising him was great fun. Boys are so straightforward, bless them.