Of Being Braindrained March 7, 2008
Posted by Jen in : Journal , trackbackGawd. Another week gone without doing any writing. Oh dear.
My 5am writing slot has disappeared. I don’t know where it went. It used to be there but, since I started this going to work lark, it has ceased to exist. Whisked away to another dimension. Perhaps it’s in the same place as my sensible thoughts?
Evening writing slot. Ha! I have a strict timetable after work.
6pm: Stumble in from work. Look at children and grunt a bit. If I’m lucky, they will grunt back.
6.15: Pour glass of wine and put on pre-warmed pyjamas.
6.25: Cook dinner. Bang saucepans very loudly indeed and shout a lot. Turn the funny up on Radio 4 to drown out moaning of ungrateful children that pesto pasta every single night is boring.
7.00: Mumble incoherently about chicken sheds that aren’t actually chicken sheds. Realise that no one’s listening anyway. Shout at horrid children that I have to watch Emmerdale or else I may die. Drink a little bit more wine.
8.00: Get woken up and scraped off settee and patronisingly sent to bed by vile children.
Hmmm. See what I mean? In a bid for me to eat before nodding off, lovely bf is taking me for an Indian tonight. Sadly, we are going to the place where I made an exhibition of myself last time. Still, I’m sure they won’t remember me. Will they? And. This weekend, when I am fed, I will be writing. Non-stop. Non-stop rubbish, probably, but hey ho.
Since it’s Friday, have a writerly joke (stolen shamelessly from Karen’s blog)
How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two: One to screw it nearly all the way and one to give it a twist at the end.
Comments»
Sounds pretty much like a normal evening in our house actually. I’m even more grumpy now that Masterchef has finished. My son actually said yesterday ‘why do we have to have bolognese on a THURSDAY?’ ??
Q. How many literary critics does it take to change a light bulb?
A. None. They don’t know how to, but they’ll find something wrong with the way you do it.
I am now officially back in blogland and have been catching up -
1. Hows the hand? (Congrats on the whole not swearing thing…..I am very impressed!!)
2. When are you going to share the willy story? (You can’t make a comment like that and then just leave it there hanging!!)
3. Cooking classes for Children? (Just a thought!!)
C x
Emmerdale???
Is this for work related purposes:-)
Enjoy your night of feasting and frolics:-)
If they don’t like your choice of dinner, then they can cook their own! Mind you, I think you’ll soon be bored with beans on toast.
5am? Does that time actually exist anyway?
You could, possibly, perhaps, dare I say it: Edit The Book?
You had a 5.00 am writing slot? Blimey, I’m impressed. Have a fantastic time tonight!
I can’t believe that you had at 5 am writing slot, I am so impressed and sick with jealousy about that. I have no idea how people are able to write and hold down a full-time job so you have my sympathies! Enjoy tonight!
So … how is work?
So glad that you pre-heat your pjs. There’s nothing better.
x
I think you might find that your writing problems are centred around:
1. Emmerdale is mind rotting tosh
2. Children are mind rotting distractions
3. Work is mind rotting in so many dimensions
4. Wine is mind rotting (but obviously essential)
However, blogging is an antidote to most things … so long as you keep an {ahem} up to date blogroll, where you can find so much inspiration.
Well, I’m not sure what my excuse is. I get scrapped up off the sofa and i don’t work full time!
I think as time goes by you do get a bit used to the working stuff! Not sure how to find that 5am hour though.
JJx
I think you’re doing wonderfully! …This post made me laugh so much. Enjoy your meal tonight (are the kids having left over pesto pasta?) and a well deserved weekend. Good luck with the writing/editing!
5 am!? 5 am???!!!!
Sorry you’re missing your sanity. Have you tried looking down the back of the sofa? That’s where mine was but it’s clogged up with fluff now and doesn’t work properly.
Actually I think you are doing very well old girl. You are cooking dinner and not just microwaving stuff or sending kids to the corner shop to buy sausage rolls like m…some mothers.
Remember to get your five a day – four of which can be glasses of wine. Well it’s grape innit?
‘6.15: Pour glass of wine and put on pre-warmed pyjamas.’
Bliss!
I could eat pasta pesto every night…
Karen – your writerly jokes are tres whizzy, as I’m sure they say in France. You give your kids Spag Bog on a Thursday? *Shakes head in disbelief* Honestly, some people…
Carol – Hurrah, you’re back in Blogland. Am looking forward to reading about your Andaman adventures… hand on the mend ta; willy still hanging (good God, what are you lot like?) and, um, yes. Kids cooking. No. 1 Son does have bursts of enthusiasm in that department but, truly, you can’t begin to imagine the mess…
Lane – I have been shamefully addicted to Emmerdale for years. Corrie and E’Enders I can live without. Probably the lack of cords?
Cap’n Black – Ugh. EUURGHH, in fact. I loathe baked beans more than anything else on the planet. It’s that whole furry thing they have going on – like eating little hamsters’ feet. Edit the book, you say? Hmmm… yes, you’re quite right. Quite right indeed. Gulp.
Maddie – Needless to say, I was half asleep by 8.30 and accused of Not Being Very Good Company. Oddly, I thought he preferred it when I stopped talking.
Yvonne – 5am is really rather a good time to get up. No distractions as all sane people are still tucked up. It’s nice, if cold, in the winter when everything is in darkness as far as I can see, my stumpy little fingers rattling or scribbling about under the single desk lamp… have I sold it to you yet? No? Oh.
Caroline – I think the new job’s going ok. I haven’t broken anything or cried yet so, um, yes!
Ah, Monsieur Bobo, the mind-rot has lifted momentarily to spot a couple of glaring omissions. This will, of course, be rectified forthwith. Sending humble and grovelling apologies. Blame the kids. I usually do.
JJ – you can at least blame the Bangkok heat for sofa scrapiness. That 5am will have to reappear or I’m doomed.
Pacha – ta for the luck, I need it. The beastly blighters had disappeared to their Dad’s before I made it home last night. Luckily, pasta keeps forever!
Helen – I know, I know. But, actually, I get up at 6 anyway so it’s really not that bad…
Fiona – Having one’s sanity clogged up with fluff is most unpleasant. At least it wasn’t at the bottom of your handbag with a half-sucked Polo stuck to it. Fermented grapes = very healthy indeed. Does a good squeeze of lime in a VodkaTonic count for the last one?
Lucy – Pasta + pre-warmed pyjamas = party time. You win though cos you do it in France. Oh, envy, envy…
You mean the children don’t still go to bed at seven?
And they told me it gets better…
Leigh – Sorry to disillusion you. They stay awake more and more and, what’s worse is that, during this staying-awakedness, they are eating. Eating, EATING, EATING. Sigh.
Oh yes, they eat more, answer back more, cost more and sleep less. All making for a mind rotting combo.
What’s wrong with having pesto over and over and over again?
H
xx
Oh dear, are you still with us?
I have done probably a most unreasonable thing and tagged you with a meme. It is quite a simple one. The rules and details are at mine, but the basics are:
1. Pick up the book you are reading, or else the nearest book (of at least 123 pages).
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences
You can vary it as you wish. Or not do it at all! You may of course have done it before unbeknownst to me. I was rather hoping you might give us a taster of the novel…
Hullaballoo – at least we age as they do and rapidly become so addled that none of it seems to matter quite as much…
Lucy – ooh, coolio, thanks muchly. Yes, still here, just, um, well, ahem. Yes. You get the idea.