Of Non-Highbrow Hilarity (or Needless Nerves) July 15, 2008
Posted by Jen in : Journal , trackbackAnd so it was that Saturday morning saw me running about like a mad thing, whipping off snippy comments to lovely bf and generally behaving as if I were embarking on the biggest blind date ever. Which I was, in a way.
Why I ever thought I would be brave enough to meet 16 strangers all in one go, I’ll never know. The Novel Racers, as a group, has been oomphing along for 18 months or so now. As an online writing group, it’s brilliant for helping those of along who are hesitantly groping our way along this writing lark in the dark. Without its encouragement I would probably have abandoned The Novel, given up writing and adopted a general air of misery.
So, online writing group = fab. Actually meeting and having to talk to real, proper writers who, unlike me, actually write stuff = absolutely terrifying. I woke in the morning with my tummy feeling proper scared. It was a washing machine, churning and gurgling away on stain-buster mode. If it wasn’t a blind date, it was a blind blogging orgy. What to wear? Which book to take in case anyone sneaked a peek? Should I sport a carnation waxed moustache for the purposes of identification?
‘So will you be taking one of those clever books you put on your blog or one of the cheesey ones you actually read?’ asked lovely bf. He can be quite cutting you know.
I took Mike Gayle’s Wish You Were Here. I hid it in my pyjamas though. No one will ever know.
Sitting on the train, I decided to jot, scribble and write my fears away.
Do not sit by Cal, it says. She is too clever, glamorous and tall and I will not be able to speak or stand up until she goes for a wee. Oh yes. When my notebooks are found after my death, I will be hailed a literary genius. Sigh.
My fears were unfounded. We managed to talk about bums and sex just like normal people do after drinking our own body weight in wine. Or was that just me? Oh.
Comments»
Sounds like fun. And certain pictures of you are rather lovely!
Cx
I thought you were rather glamorous my dear. More glamorous than your original photograph led me to believe - which completely threw me. I was expecting you to look a certain way and you weren’t! Sorry I didn’t get to chat with you much. Hope you didn’t think I was a dork for being thrown. Maybe we could meet up again soon? (i.e before baby pops out).
You were (are) SO glamorous and brilliant, what were you worried about??!!
Lovely to chat with you…still didn’t get to see that navel though…
xxx
Great to meet you on Saturday, o helical one :o)
Been in any agricultural accidents recently ;oP
I’m so jealous that I wasn’t there! The photos look great, like you all knew each other for ages which I suppose is kind of the case…still, nervewracking to meet people you’ve never seen in the flesh before. Glad you had a great time.
It was great wasn’t it!? I really enjoyed it and can’t wait for the next one!
It was really lovely meeting you! You are just as wonderful as I thought you’d be! Our chat before you left meant a lot - it was good to get stuff off my chest.
P.S. I agree with Lucy and Helen - You are glamorous! I could certainly imagine you at your book signings!
Sounds great and I now have an image of you as a total glamour puss :o) I’ve decided I can’t possibly finish my novel until I’ve been to one of these meetings. As I’m still on the waiting list, that might be quite some time…
Caroline - Mmm, yes, lovely if you like the lardy lush look! We missed you…
Helen - I hadn’t realised you didn’t know it was me when I leapt upon you! We will DEFINITELY have to get together before baby makes an appearance.
Lucy D - I’m saving my navel for a special occasion. It was most marvelous to get to talk to you more than our last brief encounter.
Cap’n Black - Oh my God, I’d forgotten about that. You are funny.
Yvonne - It really felt as if we properly knew each other after the initial weirdness had worn off. It was great - you’d have loved it.
Paige - Oh, you are sweet. I enjoyed our natter - luckily it was our feet rather than the talking apparatus that was worn out eh? (And I’m thinking that the greasy-haired, no make-up look is not one I’ll adopy for book signings!)
Karen - you should have come! B came along and she’s a waiting list babe. Next time for sure. Then I can shatter your illusions
Sounds like an Anne Summers party to me.
Oh I am so jealous! Glad you all had a lovely time though x
Jen - You looked gorgeous! I would never have guessed you had greasy hair and the no make up look suits you!
I loved your glasses by the way!
No, that was just you. The rest of us were stone cold sober, and talking literary stuff.
Weren’t we?
Weird how the nerves kick in before a blind blogging orgy.:-)
Mind you the bodyweight in wine does help!
T’was a luvverly day and fab to meet you at last:-) x
Having read about the meet up on various blogs it really does sound like you all had a blast and I agree with Karen…..I too now have an image of you as a glamour puss!!
C x
(Ps. I’m hoping that some day I will get the chance to meet you)
I’ll have to adjust my perceptions a bit - my mental image of you is in wellies due to the agricultural cnnections. Dead glam wellies, of course.
bedshaped - Oddly, I’ve never been to an Anne Summers party. Is lucky that we have your experience for comparable evidence. But I’m sure we were talking about sex in a purely literary way. It all seems a bit hazy for some reason.
Helen - It was very fab indeed. Writing types are really rather nice, aren’t they?
Paige - You will make me blush with all these compliments. And then I’ll look as if I’ve been on the sauce again. Desist, I beg you!
Leigh - I’m not saying a word. You have now seen the evidence. Will send more, if you like? (With a ransom note for our god sense, made from cut-out letters from a newspaper)
Lane - It was sooo brill to meet you - not least because you actually look like ‘you’ which is most pleasing to my teeny Brian.
Carol - ditto! I was talking to JJ about you coming over… it would be such fun if we could catch up somewhere along the way.
Honeysuckle - My wellies are made from solid gold and have glitter and rubies stuck to them with a Pritt Stick. Proper glam, see?
Sounds like a fab day. Where are the photos???
WHAT?? I could have come even though I’m not fully fledged?? I didn’t know that. Right, I’m off for a gigantic sulk now. With chocolate…
See, bloggers are not all sad sociopaths. Sounds lots of fun and I’m sure you knock them all dead with your glamour, erudition and drunken mouthing off about sex and bums.
I went to an Ann Summers party once. Just to try to convince that I did once live a life in the real and worldly world…
Did you know you can get transparent wellies to show off your trendy hand-knitted socks? They’re probably an effete townie abomination though.
Oh, too have been soooooo close and yet so bloddy far. Glad you had a wonderful time.
lizx
You looked so normal! In my mind’s eye you always had a dark blue top and were kind of… rectangular…
(LOL Leigh!)
(Commiserations, Liz - next time?)
Maddie - On Facebook. Come and be our friend
Karen - Oh, no, I can’t believe you didn’t come now… just assumed you were still in training. You’ll just have to have double the fun at the next one.
Lucy - Ann Summers does wellies? Or is that just the rural division? Oh, the mind boggles. See-through thermals for the seduction up north perhaps?
Liz - Oh, bloddy hell, I can’t believe you weren’t there. We should have the next one in Dubai - or Bangkok. Or mine and Zinnia’s fave, Trinidad…
Zinnia - eh? I am a bottle of Bombay Sapphire?
I thought I’d commented here! Sorry
The weirdness only lasted about ten seconds and then it was just fab. Am so glad I made it.
Hey, I’ve got it! Next time the meet should be an Anne Summers party! Wouldn’t that just be…. actually quite insane?
The wine is kicking in again. Ignore me
B - I’m glad you made it too. You’re drinking wine? Oh, that’s terrible. practically teetotal me. Hic.
Ooh, sounds like it was great fun!
Now that I’m reading your post it’s dawning on me that I would definitely have had a butterfly attack if I’d been going. So there’s an upside to missing all the sport, namely, that unless I get a whole lot richer, or one of these meetings actually does end up in Trinidad, I can read about all the boozy fun and watch the photos with ne’er a queasy twitch to the stomach!
There now. I feel much better.