Of Umbrella-Induced ‘Um’… November 21, 2008
Posted by Jen in : Journal , trackbackOh. Hello dear reader. Um… how are you? Where’ve you been? Nowhere? Really? Oh. Me neither.
Gawd. I’ve gawn right off this Winter malarkey. I mean, bring on the snow if you like but all this rain… and darkness. One thing I hadn’t considered when taking a full time job is that I’d be working in the dark. I truly do not like it one little bit. The dark is for dressing gowns, glow-y lamps and a tipple or two. Not stumbling about in the gloom, trying to convince your brain that the day hasn’t actually ended.
Anyway. Excitement. Erm… let me think. On Tuesday, I accidentally went to work dressed in a long, dodgy Victorian-style bustle skirt. This, in itself, might not have been too weird. I think it was the biker jacket on top that made me look slightly deranged. I don’t think anyone noticed. Luckily, today is dress-down Friday – even though we don’t actually have dress-down Friday. Dress-down Friday occurs on any day that finds me clutching longingly at my jeans and woolly socks. Oh dear.
What else? Lovely bf nearly got arrested by the fuzz for something he didn’t know about. Luckily, after looking him up and down, the rozzers immediately ascertained that he could not possibly be any sort of criminal mastermind. I think it’s because of his beard. Facial furniture is the way to go when deflecting attention from criminal mastermindery. Top tip there. You can what you pay for on this blog, I tell you.
Um… no, sorry. I’m afraid that was the combined contents of both my brain and week.
As you were.
Comments»
Trying to work out when you might usually where a ‘long, dodgy, Victorian-style bustle skirt’ cos I know for a fact you don’t live in Hebden Bridge. (Not that they go in big-time for Victoriana over there but there’s more of the unusual in evidence than in say, Preston or Lytham St Annes.)
You are going to have to post a picture of your Victorian-style bustle skirt and biker jacket combo…..it sounds rather fab!!
C x
Ps. I’m now thinking that I should get a bustle….that way I can pretend it’s all bustle and I absolutely don’t have a fat arse….
Ooh, scary nearly getting arrested for something you didn’t do - worst nightmare scenario me thinks - could you write a play about it? hee hee x
The dark is also not for getting up in, IMO. Still, one more month and the days start getting longer again. And maybe next year we’ll get an actual summer.
The dark days feel very strange to me at the moment but then it feels more like Christmas is approaching and the days will be getting longer. hang in there and yes picutre pls of bustle skirt ensemble!
On the upside though, dark days might mean oyu can get away with late afternoon ‘working naps’ by simply claiming your body is yet to adjust to the time of year.
Or, even better, claim you have a mortal fear of the dark and so cannot possibly still be out and at work after dusk - your doctor says you need to be in a dressing gown and tipsy before the sun goes down…
I know a dodgy doctor that can sort out a note for you…
I’m liking the sound of your Darcy Bussell/Bustle. Top marks for taking sartorial dashing combos into the work place. Unless it was corduroy?:-)
I love the cartoon. Picture two is clearly the way to go … so why I am still doing picture one?
Honeysuckle - Ah, where I live is neither here nor there. I mean, it is, because right now it’s here, obviously, but sometimes - when I’m somewhere else - it’s there. Glad we sorted that one out then.
Carol - You’ve rumbled my fat arse secret!
Amanda - Actually, it must be really easy to get sucked into a big hoohah unknowingly. Write a play about it? Yes… my pantomime horse would make a marvellous villain. How’s yours going?
Zinnia - An actual summer, you say? Crumbs. I’ve forgotten what one looks like. So glad I didn’t bother with my bikini diet - the balaclava diet is so much more robust.
Liz - Ooh, yes, it is quite Christmassy with all the glowy shops. Must seem like another planet for you.
Watching - Your doctor friend sounds as if he’s inspired by Noel Coward. Now THAT would make a fairly funky premise for a play. A working nap sounds just the ticket which is a shame because I’ve just woken up.
Lane - Corduroy? Um… LOL! Yes, it was/is believe it or not!!!!!
Helen - You and me both Honeybun. I’m sure we’ll get the hang of no. 1 at some point. *Sigh*
LOL at your skirt, though not at poor b/f, thank heavens he has his facial furniture to save him.
I have to admit that I’m with Helen when it comes to the cartoon, I always aim for pic 2 but end up doing the same as in pic 1.
Your feed’s just started working again, and tells me I have ten posts of yours unread. I may be neglectful but not that much.
Knitting might be an even better way to disguise criminal mastermind tendencies, no one would ever suspect, as might doing cartwheels.
For some reason the expression ‘rozzers’ for police always amuses me immoderately.
I’m done with the darkness too. It goes on for FAR too long. At least your week didn’t involve rodents. Maybe those over-enthusiastic peelers could come round here and arrest the buggers? Then again, they’ve all got facial hair so it probably wouldn’t work. Tut.
Debs - Do you think we’d be bored if we actually achieved Pic 2? We’d become ever so fat too…
Lucy - You are never neglectful, you are quite lovely. I’m thinking cartwheeling away from bank robberies, while wearing a knitted moustache. And yes, ‘rozzers’ is a fabulous expression isn’t it?
Karen - Ooh, peelers, another good term. We have Sunday snow in Sussex so I’m liking the weather today. Not rodents though. Eurgh. You are very brave - I’d have had to move house.
We’ve had snow, and plenty of it, since Friday. I do not like it. It’s now raining, so I am optimistic it will be gone by the time I need to go to work tomorrow…
Not very well !!!!! :-((
I love the dark. I’m even writing a story about a situation where the sun doesn’t come up for ages, if ever again!
Cat - Our Southern snow only lasts for half an hour before it buggers off. This is good in the Not Falling Over department but a bit rubbish in the Must Buy New Boots department.
Mandy - Flippin hard, innit?
Spectrum Mysteron Traitor - You probably have special glowy eyes made out of radioactive porridge. In fact, I remember thinking there was something ‘different’ about you in the summer..?
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