Of Defiant but Definite Deadlines October 28, 2009
Posted by Jen in : A210, General Shame , trackbackI can see into the future. Did you know that? I foresee that Friday will find my back aching, mainly after the exertions of limbo-ing manically under Thursday’s deadline for my first A210 essay. The thing I love about deadlines is the focus they generate. Focus, mainly, on doing anything other than the job in hand. I’ve taken the day off today. The plan of action? That I spend last night ploughing through the rest of Pride and Prejudice before devoting today to writing a fascinating essay about narrative voice & dialogue. This will be completed before I whizz in circles like WonderWoman, emerging with style and polish before heading off, with a sense of accomplishment, to be entertained by Simon Amstell.
In reality? I was accosted, as I frequently am, by a dose of the Rampant Randoms. I ended up discussing furniture with a friend, decorating long distance before being treated, by phone, to a live double bass and voice rendition of Fly Me to the Moon. I then fell asleep with Jane Austen in my lap and forgot to make the bread. So far, so bad. But sofa, so good for recipient of furniture-buying advice. This morning, I’ve done two loads of washing, swigged plentiful tea, made bread and contemplated, if one professes to live in a higgledy piggledy teeny tiny cottage, as I do, just how much higgle and piggle can be crammed in at any one time. The answer, after some nifty quadratic formula and a little rubbing of my academic beard brought forward the response: quite a bit really.
You may deduce from this, dear reader, that I shall be having a little cry quite soon. So I’m going to get on with it. Once I’ve worked out how long it would take to ride to Brighton on the back of a tortoise, in the rain, whilst wearing a bowler hat. Procrastination? Me?? Get away with you. I’m not even blogging. See?
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Take pride in your skills, lovey. You’re a fine procrastinator. You have the motivation for it, the tools for it – blogger, twitter, facebook, etc. – and you’re even prepared to resort to the washing. I might have to give you an award.
“I’ve taken the day of today.”
I’m intrigued by this sentence. I like it a lot. I really want it to be some kind of typo and mean nothing at all though, because the alternative is that you are cleverer than me and I am too stupid to understand what you mean.
As for academic essays and the like, I spent a lot of yesterday banging my head against academia in general while I tried to get my brain wrapped around a literature review I’m supposed to be doing. Those academics don’t half like speaking in riddles. Not only that, but once they’ve committed their riddles to paper, they label them with titles that are really difficult to search for, and then hide them away in the depths of the internet behind a million passwords, slow sites and lengthy downloads. I was at it for a couple of hours and all I have to show for it is a load of incomprehensible pdf files. And I don’t even know if they’re the right ones. Or what they’re about. Bother.
But… I can do a bit of crowing on the procrastination front. After a lifetime spent mostly procrastinating and avoiding doing what I’m supposed to be doing, I’ve somehow landed in a place where I’m the one doing assignments as soon as I’m given them, months before their deadlines are even due. What’s my secret? I’m really not sure. I never used to be like this. Several factors, I think. One is the “If you want something done, ask a busy person” thing. My days start at 6.30am, when my boy wakes. I do a couple of hours of mummying, then I go to school or college and do working, then I come home and do mummying again for a few hours, then once the kids are in bed I do work-related stuff before falling into bed around midnight or later. I don’t have much choice in this: If I didn’t work in the evenings I’d never stay on top of the workload. So now that it’s half term and my eldest is with my parents and I am at home all day, I don’t even think about it much: I have to do work, and so I do. There won’t be any other opportunities.
Another big factor, I suspect, is something my tutor said to me at the beginning of the course. Something along the lines of, “They all moan, you know, about the heavy workload on this course. But it’s the mothers who are always the most organised, hand their assignments in early, get everything done. And they’re the ones with the least spare time.” And that made me feel all superior, so now I have to live up to this better-than-them label I’ve been given. I wonder if she says to the others, “Those parents, they’re always moaning about their kids and getting distracted by ill babies and the like… it’s you lot who really knuckle down and get on with stuff. You lot take it seriously.”?? I wonder if it would work if she did?
OMG Jen, you’re such a deadline junkie. But you will do it. Now get working (or phone you tutor for an extension, my favourite technique)
Cx
Leigh – I knew you’d understand. An award? I’ll like a tiara please. I’d wear it whilst washing up. (An alliterative tiara, therefore writerly and not procrastinating at all)
Squidgy – Blimey, that’s a comment and a half! I’m impressed. Have amended my cleverness to allow for the less brilliant than me. (Oops. Oh yes, I can do a literature degree. Just have trouble spelling 3-letter words. Meh.) Yep, ask a busy person. I work full time, am a single parent, doing a degree but *still* extending the day to its limits to fit in both writerly urges, photography and the occasional molecule of fun. Maybe it’s not that we “have” to do it but simply because we can’t bear not to?
Cathy – I suspect my inner drama queen likes the sobbing hobble to the finish line, getting assignments sent seconds before the guillotine drops. If my life were a movie, they’d play awfully cheesey music at the bit where I finally hit ’send’ with tears running down my cheeks. Extensions? Erm… suspect I need to save my quota!
Ahh Jen, deadlines are all in the mind m’dear. Time used intellengently can be a waste of time whereas procrastinating thinking is allowing your mind to come out to play!
Now will you be riding this tortoise bareback as methinks you need to invest in a saddle to give some support. Oh and a set of spurs!
TFx.
“Maybe it’s not that we “have” to do it but simply because we can’t bear not to?”
You’re right! And when you add up all the stuff you manage to do, it really is astonishing. And here you are chiding yourself for doing some odd jobs about the house. Pish.
Sorry about my previous comment btw, it was excessively long. And the funny thing is is that the whole bragging-about-not-procrastinating-any-more thing was… er… a great pile of procrastination. I’m supposed to be writing a really tedious assignment. So far all I’ve managed to do is open a load of files and save an empty Word document. Hmm.
What are you like, you procrastinating pair? And, Jen, I have now witnessed your getting-ready-to-go-out antics, so I’m not sure Wonderwoman is the analogy I would choose. Catweazle, maybe? *runs away very very fast*
I withdrew from the photography course. So you’re beating me!
Go on. You can do it! *cheerleads* (gently)
I feel a failure. I hadn’t deduced at all up till that point that you’d be having a little cry in the near future. How unempathetic of me. Shall have a little cry alongside to make you feel better.
Get on with it. You will never know a more exciting phase in your life unless you end up seated on an electric chair. Mind you, everything you say takes me back to my uni days as a mature student, ‘cept I woz very MATURE and don’t let the rumours confuse you.
If you stopped having wrestling matches with aubergines, then perhaps you’d have more time on your hands!
Just a thought.
HOw you eventually got on with it!
lx
You’ll do it, somehow. Not sure how, of course, but I bet you will. Deadlines are like imaginary little axes hanging over our heads, ready to drop at the designated time.
Why do we do this to ourselves? Because we’re probably a little mad and love the incentive. No? I need more tea.
Day off!
You know what, I never even thought of that.
I’m slightly disappointed now. How idiotic.
I rather love this though: “I’ve taken the day off today. The plan of action? That I spend last night ploughing through the rest of Pride and Prejudice”
I love the idea of taking today off so that you can do something yesterday. I’m going to try it. :O)
A little cry later on? Glad I’m not the only procrastinator to indulge in being woeful when it all gets to much (i.e. I’ve done pretty much everything other than the set task and the deadline is looming
)
Good luck with the deadline x
Pride and Prejudice is one of my faves as well, ermmm I have lots to do, may well pop on the kettle and read instead
The Rampant Randoms are running riot over here at the moment. I haven’t cried yet, but probably will. Hopefully you’re back in the groove and meeting deadlines with a toothy grin by now – if not, I hope you’ve at least made some bread. I fancy a bit of toast
)
TF – I hadn’t given much thought to bareback or saddled. *Goes off to Amazon to search for Tortoise Saddle, Ladies, Leather*
Squidgy – You procrastinated by talking about not procrastinating? I raise my hat to you Sir. Er, Madam. Saving empty Word docs is feat not many can manage.
Queenie – Hmm, yes, you’ve witnessed my shame that I can spend an hour preening and still look windswept before setting foot outside the house. But Catweazel? That’s a *little* harsh.
Beth – I think you have quite enough to be going on with, don’t you?
Honeysuckle – Cripes, we will all drown to death if we cry all at once. Maybe we could establish a sobbing rota of some sort? We could weep on each others’ behalfs? (behalves? oh, I don’t know)
DOT – I never listen to rumour. Not unless it’s really juicy. Blimey, you didn’t did you…?
bedshaped – Yep. It were the aubergines wot done it. I did actually sustain a nasty injury from an aubergine. They’re not as meek as they look you know.
Liz – I did. I sent it. Then spent a week lamenting its crapness, my crapness and all crapness which holds my good sense together. Steeled myself got crap mark. Cried a bit more. Got a good mark. Er… yeah. Not long until I’m behind with the next one
Debs – Yes, a little mad would cover it. But then don’t they say that if you think you’re mad, you’re probably not? Am confused now. More tea for me too.
Suidgy – Ah. Sorry about that. Life is terribly disappointing. You just can’t get the typos anymore. And did I not tell you about my time machine? It’s vay good.
Danielle – Getting everything else done is surprisingly unsatisfying, isn’t it? The deadline glares at you over your newly topiaried houseplants in quite a menacing manner.
Karen – Actually, as I type this, I realise that once again I’ve forgotten the bread and there’s nothing to give the boys for packed lunch. Oops.
I will go back and do the photography at some point! but, errm, i think not may next year as my dad suggested (i think he was having a dim moment). i might be slightly busy then.